Now that I’ve made my ebook “Who Cares? Life for an Irish Transgender Teen” free to the public (you can download the full thing here), I’ve decided to publish the chapters here on my website. Below is a chapter from this book which was published in April 2016.
I’ve had many friends over the years. Many people who have come in and out of my life and I am grateful for each and every one of them. When you’re young, friendships end all of the time. I’ve lost many people along the way but that is okay. It’s natural for this to happen. I wasn’t always good to my friends. I went through a long journey in which I learned how to be a good friend. I’d like to think that I’m a better friend now. I try to be there for my friends as much as I can. Because that’s all you can do at the end of the day. Be there when they need you and be there when they don’t. I have many people that I count as my friends. Many people that I really appreciate and that I love to spend time with. There are too many to discuss in this chapter. Instead I’ll just talk about the people currently in my life that I spend the most time with. It is not my intention to offend anyone in this chapter. I love all of my friends dearly and it’s difficult for me to omit people. However I must.
Róisin Chapman. I met Róisin a few days into college. We were going to a club and I had no idea who she was, even though I’d heard a lot about her. She needed directions and she was on the phone to Lauren. Lauren then handed me the phone and before I knew it, I was directing her. After arriving at the club we chatted in between dances. In the taxi that we shared home, we discovered that we got on very well. Róisin is from Donegal. She’s quick-witted, supportive and relaxed. We are the two that laugh about upcoming assignments while everyone else is freaking out about them. She’s extremely intelligent and fun to be around. We go for dinner and lunch and coffee together. We have a mutual appreciation for hot chocolate and Parks and Recreation (the programme, not the government department). Our buses to college go in the same direction and in rush hour traffic we Snapchat one another trying to figure out who will get there first. She always wins. At Christmas she had me for kris kindle and got me one of the loveliest and most considerate presents I’ve ever received. The thing that I most love about her is her relaxed approach to life. My hope for her is that she stays exactly the same because she is wonderful.
Sophie Clarke. I met Sophie on a dance floor. She approached me and I thought that she was in love with me. I then recognised her from my course and I still think that she’s in love with me. A few days later we went for coffee where she introduced me to the pumpkin spice latte (we’re not always that typically white) and we talked about life and love and our futures. We were instant friends. We both have an appreciation for French and Lana Del Rey and she makes me laugh. She appreciates life so much and appears to see the beauty in everything. We don’t get to hang out as much as we’d like to because she lives far away from me but this only makes us appreciate our time together more. I think she will make an amazing writer some day because she has a beautifully unique viewpoint on the world. She is one of the most complimentary people I’ve ever met and being in her company always makes you feel so good. I love to completely take the piss out of her because she always just laughs at herself. We share an insecurity about the size of our noses (I hope she doesn’t mind me sharing that) that has bonded us in ways that no one could understand. I assure her that her nose is fine and she lies telling me that mine is too. The thing that I most love about her is her outlook on life. My hope for her is that she sees how remarkable a person she is because I don’t think she realises it.
Lauren Fetherston. I met Lauren at the end of a party. I had spoken to her once or twice before that but I didn’t even know her name. She told me about an after party that she was going back to and how she wouldn’t know anyone at it. Myself and another girl decided to go with her. I’ve never been able to resist a good party. We shared a taxi and discussed the law of attraction. I knew I’d be friends with Lauren after that. Lauren is one of the biggest worriers I’ve ever met. She stresses about things that I’ve never even thought about and it’s hilarious. Myself and Róisin often have to remind her not to worry about meaningless things and I reckon we’ve become pretty good at helping her to relax. Lauren and I go for drinks, lunches and have sleepovers. In December, we went to see Marina and the Diamonds and it was glorious. We have the strangest conversations and we’re both borderline insomniacs. She tells me whether she approves of my decisions or not and gets angry on my behalf when she believes that I’m being treated badly. She makes me laugh so much. She could be completely serious one minute and be laughing uncontrollably the next. The thing that I most love about her is her protectiveness of me. My hope for her is that she stops worrying about silly things and gets everything that she wants in life.
Diane Kehoe. I met Diane one year into secondary school. I saw that she was a new girl in the queue for class and began speaking to her. I somehow got it into my head that her name was Naomi and began calling her this. We’ve always gotten along very well although we’ve fallen out of touch at times. She comes to visit me in Dublin and we go to clubs, coffee shops and for walks through the city. I have so much time for her because she’s so easy going. She’s extremely musically talented although she would disagree with that statement. We’ve sang together at school ceremonies and shows even though she’s much better than me. She completely supports me and gets excited when I succeed at something. The two of us once attended an exclusive, extremely fun party in Dublin where I ended up vomiting red moonshine on my white jeans. We have many memories together and we regularly laugh about them. We used to have an obsession with Nicki Minaj and we have many private jokes. We both have a fondness for boys, music and vodka. The thing that I most love about her is her willingness for adventure. My hope for her is that she leads a colourful life where she can experience many things.
Megan Leonard. I met Megan in secondary school although we didn’t start hanging out until a few years later. My earliest memories of her are her obsessions with bands that I considered to be quite emo and heavy metal. We are the complete opposite of one another. We never agree on anything and we spend our entire time together insulting one another. We are best friends. We make each other laugh a lot. It must be strange to be in our company because we kill each other but that’s actually really enjoyable for us. We know exactly how to piss each other off and we often do so. There’s no pressure when it comes to our friendship. We could go weeks without hearing from one another and then spend hours on the phone catching up. We have really cute sleepovers in which we bake, watch movies and talk for hours. We don’t listen to music though because there are only two musicians that we can agree on: The 1975 and Halsey. We both got extremely drunk at our graduation and we spent the meal not eating, giggling and making up songs. We’ve been through an awful lot together but we’ve always been there for one another. The thing that I most love about her is her ability to insult me. My hope for her is that she finds her passion in life and follows it.
Yasmin Smith. I met Yasmin the week before we started college. I immediately admired her quirky bohemian style and her bright laugh. I didn’t think that we had much in common at first but after we’d spoken a few times, I realised that she was extremely funny, sarcastic and original. We like all of the same TV programmes and some of the same music. We have the same views on fame and religion and we both love to party. Every Tuesday we meet up with our other friend Michael and have coffee. Well I have coffee, they have hot chocolate. Tuesdays were my longest and toughest days in college so it has not been an easy fate for them to hang out with me afterwards. They must be masochists. We both love Hozier and clothes. We rarely disagree on things. We are extremely sarcastic to one another but we enjoy each other’s company (I think. I can never tell because of all the sarcasm). She’s one of the only people that I could spend my entire day on my phone texting. I can rarely do that with anyone without getting bored. She’s a year older than me so I like to make out that it’s a huge age gap. The thing that I most love about her is our shared dream to one day live a life of glamour and luxury. My hope for her is that we achieve that dream.
I am truly honoured to call these people my friends. I genuinely wouldn’t be half as happy as I am without these people. I hope to have them in my life forever but if I somehow don’t, I will always appreciate the amazing support that they’ve given me. I have a lot of love for people that I will probably never speak to again but that’s okay. Sometimes we can’t keep in touch with the people we love. But knowing that we have that love is enough. God I got very sentimental there.
Friends, if you’re wondering how you can ever repay me for this lovely chapter you cannot. Unless you want to write a book about me. Actually that’s a great idea. Let’s just fill the shops with books about me.
Read more Who Cares? here.
Buy Who Cares? here.
Listen to my interview with Róisin Chapman about alcohol abstinence in college below: